Appreciate the Stress of the Life you Choose

I accept it. The stress that is. The stress of the life I choose. I chose to wake up at 5am everyday to go hustle in the mortgage business. I could be a barista or a janitor if I chose to be . Live a stress free existence . But that shit ain't for Cam Villa. But neither is speaking in the third person. I like the stress. Bring it all on me. I don't crack that easily. And if and when I do I will act accordingly. But do  really even know what stress really is? I don't have kids and I don't have a mortgage. I do still live paycheck to paycheck but it's getting better . Or maybe I am just getting smarter. I stopped drinking and doing hard drugs over 6 months ago and that has brought a mental clarity that has been amazing. It doesn't erase the stress but it allows me to cope. The more minutes of the day that I am myself , the more chances I get to get to succeed. And in this life it's about getting in as many swings as I can.

10 years of what?

Today it will have been 10 years since my father passed away. Sometimes it seems like a world away and other times it feels as if I just saw him yesterday. I miss him a lot but I also understand that a whole lot of him is in me. Therefore when I really miss him I just have to look into myself and I find it comforting .

Joe Marion Villa III was a good man. He had a pretty dry sense of humor and was a fabulous cook. He would bend over backwards for you but he was passionate about making sure you understand how respect and hard work are business partners in a thriving industry called "Life". We had become very close over the years before his death and I will always be thankful for that . He was quick to give you his advice on something but he never got upset when you didn't follow his words. I liked that about him. He didn't judge but he at least had to get out his point before you make a choice.

I know he is up there, here, by a beach, with Fran his wife, watching over my brother , sister, and all the people in our family . I miss you Joey V. But I want to let you know I am doing great , and if I can't see you I can always lead by your examples.

Ain't nothin like a cane

Firstly, I want to state that canes or any other walking apparatus that resembles a cane is only "cool" when you don't have to use it. That being said some days I look like an old man and on other days I look like a street hardened pimp looking for my next dollar. It all depends on my dress.  I have moved up from crutches to a walking cane about two weeks ago. I feel like I am starting to get this old life back. I can get around a lot better and I am able to do things like cook and carry my own plate. That doesn't sound like a lot but when you have a choice between eating over a sink and having to ask someone to carry your plate it starts to get frustrating . My doctor said I have come a long ways and the physical therapy I have been doing has shown. That being said I still am a long ways off from running, jumping, and the occasional flip off a diving board. But remember life is about progress, and I feel like I have made a lot of that. No one was against me during this process but a lot of people doubted I would be back at it so fast. They said I would walk for six months. But hey when you ain't got kids, a mortgage, and no car payment, you got some time to get better. I couldn't have done it without Jamee "Jimmy" Sims, but we don't have to tell her that cause she'll just read it in this blog. Watch out World!

I am man, hear me roar

Happy New Year everybody! I wish you the best in 2012.
About a year and a half ago I started this blog. I wanted to get some stuff off my chest and just talking about it wasn't cutting it.  I was at a point in my life were things weren't going the way I planned it. My job sucked, my alcohol and drug use were out of control, and the relationships with the people closest to me were stressed out or non-existent.  I was tired of life around me and just wanted to walk away. So I started to write this blog. Things started to make sense. I was able to go back and read my words and I started to see a change in my behavior. The things I learned, is that life is not my motion picture to direct. I can never be a director of my own movie and also hope to star in it. Life doesn't work that way. The only thing I can be responsible for is my own actions. That was a tough pill to swallow.

So in July of 2011 I made a conscience effort to be sober. No more alcohol and drugs to alter my mind and personality. It was tough at first but I learned that life has so much more to offer when I am not out chasing a high. Earlier in the same year I also decided to leave the place I was working and to start working with someone I looked up to with great respect. Making those two choices allowed me to focus my energy of growing in my personal life. To have the love of a partner is something that is sought by many and obtained by few . I have that and it is my oppotunity to embrace it and grow together. I am not perfect and for fucking god's sake I hope I never am. My life is just that, mine, and I hope that 2012 brings more happiness, more roadblocks to conquer, and new goals to focus upon. So again I wish anyone who takes the time to read this the very best of luck to you in this new year approaching .

Stay Cool

Tis the season where life seems to catch up with you. It's the time of the year when money seems short, everybody wants a Christmas present, and the goals for next year seem pretty unattainable. On top of that I still got this broken leg from my freak rugby accident on October 1st. Usually January is my worst month of the year but the last three have been pretty fucked up so I can't see what curve ball the first month of the year can throw? But I better not jinx myself .
I am looking forward to building a successful business with my homeboy and mentor J-Mo. We work really well with one another and what I lack in sales I make up for in operations. What he lacks in operations he makes up for as an amazing salesperson. We sell loans and 2012 is going to be the revival of our business. So watch out world!
On a side note I want to thank my girl for taking care of me for all this time while I recover from this jacked up leg . She has been the best. I am super annoying and she still makes me two eggs, toast and fruit every morning before she gets ready for work. I can't imagine being in her position . If i wasn't so god damn cute she probably would have left me by now .

So I am looking forward to the New Year. Especially walking again, making some paper, working on my sobriety, and conquering the world with my chick 

Oak Park. The Land of Dreams

I am serious and sincere when I say that. Oak Park is literally the land of dreams. Now whether those dreams came true or are in the midst of coming true is up to the beholder. As I as look at 9th ave, which happens to be the street I call home I can tell you about most of my neighbors. The first ones on the block run a successful landscaping business and play a lot of baseball on the weekends . They are a nice Latino family. My next door neighbors to my right are a young couple whom are both in school. She is trying to become a medical assistant and he is finishing his AA degree. The neighbors to my left are a married couple. She is a professional piano player and he is a some kind of computer engineer. I don't know what he does actually but he is nerdy enough to put it all on some sort of computer engineering . The girl plays piano all day , everyday. I think she is playing different songs everyday but my girl insists that she is playing the same songs. She's pretty good. Further down the block we have a Muslim family that are always very polite and seem quite active in their community. Over the last year we have had an investor by the name of Sultan buy about three of four houses on the block and fix them up. He really cleaned them up and found some nice renters to live in them.

 

People are living their own lives in my neighborhood. Sure we have crackheads, homeless people, and others just keeping it above the poverty line . But we also have culture, hard work and people who are still living their dreams. When I was younger I used to think Oak Park was a black neighborhood. Now I know Oak Park is a part of Sacramento history that will never go away now matter how many times they try and rezone it . It is filled with all types of people. Good people trying to make it in this ever changing world .

To One Day Walk Again

It's been tough. Not being able to walk. I mean we have all had bouts of a sprained ankle or a twisted knee and had to stay off of it for a few days. But it is tough to imagine having to be immobile for an extended period of time. That's me. I haven't walked in over a month and a half and I won't be able to walk for at least another  7 to 8 weeks . This broken leg is the worse. It's like having a permanent sign over my head that reads "Ask Me What Happened?" I am determined to be a functioning part of society again soon but I can only do so much.

It's depressing to think about . Living in a world where seeing steps make my palms sweaty and the thought of rain or ice bring on thoughts of immediate defeat. All I want to do is run up a flight of stairs or jump over the smallest of obstacles . But I am stuck holding these pair of crutches and forced to move at others pace. I go to my second doctors appointment tomorrow in hopes of good news. Maybe I am healing faster than usual or maybe I can start physical therapy sooner rather than later?

The best part about breaking my leg is everyday has been an improvement. I mean I literally wake up in a better mood every morning. My leg feels better and my relationship with life is improving daily. I am so thankful for the woman in my life because without her I would be spending days on the couch moping around . I am even back at work because "the bills" don't care if your leg is broken . Having this broken leg has made me appreciate the power of the human mind and the strength of my loved ones. I know i can be a real pain in the ass but that same drive is what is going to get me moving on both of these legs soon.

The only advice I can offer and I know it always sounds cliche but don't waste the things you have . And if you do waste them they weren't ever meant to be yours in the first place . I could complain all day about this but then I realize I will walk again and that is a lot more than others are working with.

On the Road to Recovery

Tibial Plateau Fracture

          It has been a little bit since I have been able to write on this blog. I am recovering from a pretty severe broken leg that I got playing in hopefully my very last rugby game.  I am currently staying at my parents house because my residence has a claw bathtub that I can't get into and way too many steps. But hey, I am alive and I will recover from this. Maybe not financially, as I viewed part of my insurance claim, for the first three days it was sixty thousand dollars.  I have never even made sixty thousand in a year except that one time. So the money part of it I can't really even fathom. I stayed in the hospital for a total of 8 days
         The truth is I am getting better every single day. I can now move my leg and do things I thought were impossible 7 days ago. I might not walk in the year 2011 but that doesn't mean I can't embrace this road to recovery. I am so thankful to have my family, my girlfriend, and a great group of friends supporting me through this. It was a very traumatic experience and when I think about the injury I get a little choked up . The though of hearing my leg crack into a bunch of pieces doesn't do a lot for one's self confidence.

        The injury I sustained is called a tibial plateau fracture. Pretty much it means you shattered your leg right below the knee. It is an injury often seen in car vs pedestrian accidents   It has taken two plates and tens screws just to get my leg back to normal. I guess airport security is now going to be an ongoing issue. The folks at Enloe Hospital and UC Davis Hospital treated me great. I can't thank them enough for taking care of this old crabby baby.
Right now I got one leg but soon enough I will have two. So watch out world cause Cam Villa will be back .

After surgery

Tupperware. Here one day and gone the next

It's sad to say but the second I put the Tupperware into the dishwasher their is a 95% chance that I will never ever be able to match the top to the bottom  . It just disappears. I don't know where, I don't know by whom, but it is gone . I used to have quite a collection of Tupperware. Gathered over the years from parties we have thrown  or leftovers delivered from Mom . I thought I had more control over my surrounding but when it comes to the plastice containers I am but a slave . I do not know what the future holds for me and Tupperware but I will keep attempting to hold on to it. My goal is to grow old with the original Tupperware I was raised on but I see that wish fading fast .

1st track is in the books

It took me eight years of talking trash and blowing smoke to finally get back into the studio. This last Saturday I finally got to sit down with my producer Pete Cole and record the first track of the new Vitamin P CD . It felt good, it actually felt better than good, it was amazing . It was so much fun to sit down, perfect the song , and watch a true professional bring it all together. I can't thank Pete enough for taking time out of his extremely busy schedule to work with me. It was truly a great experience.

I have kind of gone the opposite direction in this entire recording process. I have played a lot of shows and rapped a bunch of times on stage but I have rarely recorded any of my songs. Looking back on this I wished I would have recorded when I had a great song at hand. But maybe it wasn't the right time for me to record and I can't fret over lost time . I am here now and ready to put these new songs done on "wax" .
The best part of the whole process is that Pete understands that I am going for an old school sound and trying to stay away from all the new stuff out there. I grew up listening to Tribe Called Quest and I want to incorporate that Jazzy sound into my music.
I look forward to the next couple months coming up and I promised myself that good things take time and I am going to embrace the opportunity to work with a great team and learn the process. So look  for me in the next couple months as we get some quality music out to the world. Check out Sanctuary Studio . They have been absolutely amazing in this whole process and I recommend them for all your projects