I just want to look like I play Golf

I am the worst golfer ever. Maybe in the history of the world. When I need to hit it straight it goes right and when I am nearing water my ball is attracted to getting wet . I used to consider myself hopeless in the game of golf but I have finally found my calling. Instead of practicing and being a good golfer I am going for "Looking" like a great golfer . I have thrown out going to the practice range and searching for professional help. It's a waste of time any money. Anyone can hit a golf ball down a wide open space. And anyone can let a club pro jerk them off for $150 an hour. I believe golf is one of those games where you just have to play and play as much as you can.

So my mission is to look like a good golfer. I had my old clubs gripped with bright red.  I hit the clearance clothes racks at Haggin Oaks and Golf Galaxy for the goofiest golf shit. I made sure that my shoes match my belt and match my hat too. I do that anyway, but when I match, people think you know what you're talking about . I also found a great deal on some legit golf balls that have been barely touched . I should have gotten my name slapped on them but that will be my next move.
The next step to looking like a good to great golfer is speed of play. Like I said before I don't hit the driving range. I only have so many good shots in me and I ain't trying to waste them on the driving range. When it is my turn to hit, I'm ready. I don't take thirty practice swings and I don't have to make sure my ball is in the perfect place. I will pick my ball up in front of everyone and better my position. Golf is war and there are no rules in war.

When I put all these things together I pretty much look like I am coming off the tour. That is until I hit the ball . Then you realize that I am just some sack trying to act like I play .

One Of The Best Weekends Ever

             

I had a good one this weekend. Actually I had a great one. I couldn’t have asked for a better three days. Nothing compares to a great weekend that requires minimal planning. It started on Friday as I exited work early. Normally I am a certified workaholic. It takes a lot to pull me from my desk. I am addicted to getting a commission check and making our clients happy. But Friday was a half day for me because I had some big plans to take care of.

Firstly I had set up some concert tickets to see one of my favorite bands Matt and Kim at The Fox Theater in Oakland. My lady and I had planned to drive down to Oakland on Friday and stay at The Waterfront Hotel at Jack London Square. I know when most people think about Oakland, not too many kind words come to mind. But we were pleasantly surprised at the kindness Oakland showed us while we were visiting. The Waterfront was a beautiful but dated hotel overlooking the Bay and Marina. The service was excellent and our room had a great view. The room had a sea theme, and rightly so, since we literally were perched over the marina.  After resting in the room for a few we went and had dinner at Miss Pearl’s restaurant. It was a southern seafood inspired restaurant.  We met the chef Eddie Blyden and to say he was a nice man was an understatement. The original version of the restaurant was a San Francisco staple thirty years ago and it has since moved on to Oakland. The food was good, the service was great, and the bread pudding was amazing. After dinner we got ready and took a ride downtown to The Fox Theater. The Theater was beautifully decorated. This was my first time at the venue but it will not be my last. I got us some seats in the balcony because I don’t do the standing room only thing at concerts. I want a safety nest to return to if things get wild in the crowd. We had some great seats in the Loge area which was in front on the general balcony seating. Matt and Kim put on a great show and Jamee and I were super impressed by their high energy and crowd engaging act. Matt can sing and play keyboard but Kim can sure play some drums. She was amazing.  After the show we literally walked out of the venue and hopped immediately into a cab and were back in our hotel room within ten minutes and tucked away in bed.

The next morning the sun was blasting through our balcony. Someone was telling us it’s time to get up. I ordered a pretty stunning room service smorgasbord of food and we decided to eat overlooking the water. We are pretty lucky just to be able to enjoy each other’s time with a great view. After breakfast we got ready and said our goodbyes to Oakland. We proceeded back towards Berkeley and made a stop at Golden Gate Fields. Horse racing is my game of choice. You can keep table games, slot machines and all other sports bets. Horse racing is where it’s at. I think in another life I may have been a dogfighting or cockfighting fan but nowadays I will stick to horse racing. My girl is a horse racing fan too and ever since we hit a trifecta on the Kentucky Derby she has been hooked. I reserved us a box and we hung out for about 6 races before we hit the road home. I didn’t win any money but after last week’s trip and winning about 600 buck I didn’t mind breaking even. When we got back to Sacramento on Saturday we sat down to witness the SF Giants take it to the Tigers in game three of the World Series. It was one of the best games I have seen and it was a prelude to witnessing them clinching it the next night.

On Sunday I woke up early and hit the links at Cherry Island. It is a tough course and I was playing against my golfing arch nemesis Steve Lanterman . He usually beats me but today I finally got the up on him during the back nine and I never let off. The course is one of those that play with your ego. You can go for the legendary shot or you can play it safe and set yourself up for the next shot. I can’t hit that far so even when I am going for it all it looks like I am going for the safe play. After golf I went back to home base and proceeded to nap for the remainder of the day until the SF Giants Game was on. We witnessed the Giants winning their 2^nd World Series in 3 years. The game was fun to watch and included the usual torture that a Giants game brings to your stomach. After watching Sergio Romo strike out the greatest hitter over the last 40 years and win the game and the World Series it was officially an end to a magnificent weekend  

I am back for the meantime

Work is a mother . I mean I never have enough time in the day. People want this and employees want that. I want to tell them to "Fuck Off" but I always think one day I might need their help so I should keep my comments light. Or even worse, one day, they might be my boss and remember when I treated them like garbage and dedicate their life to ruining mine.
I like working. I should say I love working but that would be silly. I can't not be employed. If I got fired today i would have a job tomorrow morning by 8am . It's always been that way. I was once unemployed for three months about 7 years ago and I wanted to blow my brains out . Because the only thing worse than getting paid like shit is not getting paid at all .
There isn't really anything I wont do for a good paycheck. Five years ago I would have done a lot more for money but I have come to my senses over the last few years. Back then I would have robbed, stole, and lied for 5k a month. I have come to realize selling your soul isn't worth the cost of one good month. It's about 2013 and not October 2012.

And not to overuse the quote of the almost famous rapper Vitamin P "Get your mind right and get your grind right"

One Year Without The Drink

Firstly, I want to state if you can drink and do drugs all day and night than do it. Not more, but the most power to you. I commend your drive and desire. I just couldn't take being one person at night and than someone else the next day. I know I am not the only one that feels this way but at the time I did. I wasn't acting fake. I was just lost.  It was tiring, frustrating, and financially bankrupting to keep doing what I was doing .  I have just completed over a year of not drinking or doing any hard drugs. That means no Friday night meet ups with the boys or late night calls to the dope man to score a bag. Usually they were one in the same.  How do I feel? Well life still goes on but today I can most definitely handle what is on the horizon. It's not always good or bad but I know that I can get through it. I have a feeling of inner worth knowing that I have the life skills to make my own decisions . I am okay doing things on my own now as I used to be fearful making decisions alone. I know, what a pussy.

  I will admit that I never stopped smoking marijuana . This blog isn't about me justifying my life to anyone except God or whomever the higher being is up there in the sky .  Do some people think marijuana is bad? I am sure they are out there but I know what works for me. I keep the smoking quiet unless someone asks me, but for the most part I am always down for a good puff.

Now here in lies the debate. I go to Alcoholics Anonymous . I am an alcoholic because without drinking I don't desire to do half the shit I would do being drunk. This includes talking too much, spending too much, and pretending too much.   I participate in the meetings . I would never sponsor anyone unless I was completely "sober". Those are the rules. I get a lot out of the program. For instance you can share and laugh within the meetings. I am with people that feel like I do. I would never take away from the benefit of AA, but I can't always say I follow it 100%. It's free and bases it existence on donations from fellow members. I have met a lot of great people in AA. And without AA I would not be alcohol-free today. My main knock on AA is I don't feel like talking about drugs and alcohol all day long. I wasn't doing that when I was drinking and using so why do I want to talk about it all the time when I am not ? But maybe that is part of the attraction to AA. Most of the time talking about having a problem with alcohol or drugs is a no-no to all the "normal" people out there.

The conclusion to all this is I don't drink and use today. I feel much better. I am in a place that I never though possible one year ago.  I do miss all my old friends that I used to get drunk with. I am sure they are on the same bar stool. That doesn't mean I don't want a huge Pina Colada or the coldest Bud Light in the world. I do, but like anything in life I have to make choices. One choice leads me to confidence and spiritual growth and the other leads to short term highs with really low lows . If you would have asked me ten years ago I would have taken the highs and the lows. But now I just want more . Can you blame me?

Products I support. Chapter Two. You can't go wrong with the white V-Neck

It's the truth! You can't go wrong with a clean white V-Neck. I mean you see them everywhere nowadays. It's not like they were invented a few years ago but it seems that you can always spot someone wearing one wherever you travel. I have tried all the brands. I have tried Hanes, Fruit of the Loom, JC Penney's brand, Macys, the one you find at Champ's or Foot Locker, but their is only one. There is only one brand of V-Neck that has the look, feel and won't break your pocketbook. Believe me I have seen 100 dollar V-Necks and besides buying dope off of a crackhead it would be a stupid decision to purchase one. The King of the White V-Neck in my mind is the Nordstrom brand. They come in packs of four for about 30 bucks and  even you little skinny pucks can  purchase them in slim fit. They normally come in Traditional fit and you can always buy them in store or online .  The only recommendation I can offer on good White V-Neck care is wash them with whites only and hang dry them if you get the chance. The more you use a dryer the smaller they get regardless if they say pre-shrunk.  I have a few things I really like about the classic V-Neck

1. It looks great under a dress shirt. Nothing looks stupider that seeing someone wearing a nice dress shirt and have a big chunky white crew neck shirt hanging out of the top. It makes it look like this might be your first job or you put on some dirty shirt over your dress shirt. Let it be known that the only acceptable undershirt to wear over your dress shirt is either a V-Neck or Athletic Cut T-shirt known by it's street name "Wife beater"
2. Sometimes a white V-Neck is so white it makes everything stand out. A nicely ironed or pressed white V-Neck looks good with come clean jeans and a pair of Chucks. The simplicity factor of the outfit will lend creditability to a nice, watch, great glasses, or a piece of jewelery .
3. If you can find some different colors in a V-Neck then go for it. Though all V-Necks have  a pretty short life cycle it is worth it to find some different colors . I have made a commitment to wearing the V-Neck so when I find some variety I spring into action .
4. Get your girl some V-necks or let her use yours for bed. You can't go wrong .

Products I Support . The First Chapter

When I find something I like I stick with it. Whether that is clothes or beauty products once I find something I like, it is with me, till the end. Yes, I said beauty products, because even 280 pound men need to look beautiful from time to time. This first chapter are items that use during and after I hop in the shower.

Let's start with my face. Every morning in the shower I use either Cetaphil or Panoxyl . Now Cetaphil is a mild cleanser that is great for everyday use. Panoxyl is a cleanser that will scrap paint of the side of your house. I would use this sparingly or you will wake up with itchy face. You have to find a product you can use everyday and sometimes twice a day. You need to also find out what kind of skin you have and where are your problem areas.
 After I get out of the shower I use a cotton ball and some Clean and Clear astringent to get off the extra dirt . After that I put on  the Target Up and Up Brand Moisturizer with SPF protection. These products work really well but I  always say if you can afford the Clinque 3-Step that is one to get. It has everything you need since the entire package  is a cleanser, astringent, and facial moisturizer.
 As for deodorant I used to be a strictly woman's only deodorant. I have four sisters so using my own was never an option. Women's brands are strong and it still has a nice mellow smell. I was over the men's deodorant with the extra strong scent . I felt like I was a Russian trying to cover up my regular scent   When I say deodorant I mean antiperspirant. If you want to stink after 2 hours wear deodorant. If you want to give yourself a fighting chance throughout the day wear antiperspirant. I was a Lady Speed Stick wearer for years but that was until I found Old Spice Fiji. This is a brilliant brand and it smells great. It smells so good that even my girl wears it .
These were just a few of the items I use and in the next couple of weeks I will be adding to this interesting list of products I use and support.

You, Me and Obamacare

           I think the guy is a genius. He is looking out for the American people. What do you expect the President of the United States to do? That is his job. We live in the richest, most ethnically diverse county in the world. A county that has opened its doors to people trying to make a better life for themselves . So why shouldn't he work on a bill to provide Americans with stable private healthcare ? Of course if you can afford it you should purchase it. And if you have health insurance you should be able to keep it without worry of unwarranted rate hikes. Healthcare almost seems like something only for the rich or the corporately employed can have on a regular basis. Right now I pay about $180 a month for health and dental coverage. I could spend $180 dollars in a night out with my girl or during an afternoon at an expensive golf course. Sure both of those actions are much more fun than shelling out almost $200 bucks to have the privilege of seeing a doctor to diagnose my ailments.

But check this out, I broke my left leg almost nine months ago and the final bill was $295,000! Now I wondered two things during the time I was laid up in a hospital bed. Firstly, I was there for 8 days and was amazed that $295,000 of services were performed upon me. That seemed like a lot. But what my insurance paid to settle was almost half of the total bill. The reason is the doctors provide so many services that go unsettled or under contractual obligation that if they don't overbill they lose money. I never understood the system until I was thrown into it.   Secondly I wouldn't have known what to do if I didn't have health insurance. The cost would have been a financial disaster for me and my family. The time off work alone was almost unbearable since I am 100% commission.

So I welcome the Obamacare plan being passed by the Supreme Court. Jack up my taxes if I can be assured that my fellow American citizen can be protected to seek out healthcare to protect themselves and their families

Who am I?

Who Am I? This is seamlessly an impossible question for me to answer. I could tell you who I was. A student, a musician, a rugby player, a drunk, a jokester, a cheat, and a thief. I could tell you whom I would like to become. A father, a husband, a leader, an owner, a provider . But I have a really tough time telling you who I am now. I think I am mixture of all. I know where I want to go but I can't seem to shake the persona of what I was. Does everyone have this issue or am I the only one ?  It's fun to  think about the past and it's intriguing to predict the future but it's kind of scary living in the present. The present appears to be so unpredictable and ever changing . I feel like I get my heartbroken a few times a week. I am slowly moving from what everyone else is doing to just worrying about myself and my immediate circle . That is a tough transisiton. I amost feel like I am trying to not care so much anymore. But in reality I am caring more about stuff that is important to me .

Hipper to the Game

It's not about staying on top. It's about being comfortable in thy skin while the world around us goes crazy. It's never going to stop,War, famine, economic failures, death, birth, heartache and heartbreak that is . But we can produce our minds to weather it all can't we? I mean we are all animals but what makes us different is the ability to reason in the face of danger or death. It's time to get Hipper to the Game.

Giving Yoga A Shot

I tried Yoga for my first time this week. I was truly impressed. I enjoyed the movements and the next day I really was quite sore. My favorite part of the gig was the almost total silence . I can't remember the last time I was in a room full of people and no one was talking . It was almost empowering knowing that the movements took precedence over others personal goals.

My other favorite of the evening was my girl was really good at it. I mean she did all the moves the instructor set forth . I know because I was watching her since I was unable to do the same moves ! No biggie because I know that all things that last take time . So I am excited for my next yoga class if I ever get off work early enough.